Follow Paul on Twitter: @paulstewart22
My son McCauley John Stewart will celebrate his 16th birthday this weekend. Without McCauley and my younger son, Maxwell, I would not be alive today. Plain and simple, my family is the reason I'm still here.
On Feb. 22, 1998, at 11 p.m., my wife Lori gave birth to McCauley. It was far and away the happiest day of my life up until that point. Nearing my 45th birthday, I became a first-time father later in life than many other men. There are no words to describe the euphoria when you hold your child for the first time but anyone who is a parent knows the feeling.
The next morning at 9:30 a.m., I had an appointment with my doctor and was informed that I had Stage 3 colon cancer. There was a large malignant tumor and a secondary tumor at my liver.
The doctor told me that had I waited even another few weeks to get checked, the chances of my survival would have been virtually zero. As it was, I would face surgery and chemotherapy, with a significant possibility that I would not make it five years, if that.
Dying was a non-option to me. I had to be alive for my family. That's why I had the will to fight and beat cancer. They are why I made it.
Every single moment a father can spend with his children is precious. They grow up so fast, and it's crucial to have quality time with your kids. Never take it for granted. Never be like the father in the Cat's in the Cradle song -- one of the most heartbreaking slices of real life that has ever been written --who is always "too busy" for his son because he's too focused on work. Next thing he knows, he's an old man and his grown son has no time for him.
There is no more important or urgent job in life than parenthood. If there's one thing I have learned, it is to never take a single day for granted. Every single day, I know how blessed I am to have McCauley and Max. I am in awe of my boys.
My work in hockey takes me all around the world. There are moments where the ache of missing a day with my boys hurts worse than any injury I ever suffered on the ice. There are many other times where I count down the days until I can physically be with them again. No matter where I am in the world, I try to be emotionally accessible to my family.
Thankfully, hockey has always been much more than just a sport to my family. The game has always been a bond for the Stewarts. We are now a four-generation hockey family and following my two sons' games is a source of great pride and enjoyment. I am always learning new things about myself, as well as my kids.
McCauley has taken up officiating as well as playing hockey. As I wrote the other day, I strongly encourage parents with kids in sports -- not just hockey, any sport -- to get them involved in officiating in addition to playing.
It is quite the gamut of feelings I experience when, for example, I'm watching McCauley as a player in a 2 p.m. game and then come back to the same rink and watch him ref a pee wee game at 6 p.m.
In the afternoon game, perhaps my son takes a holding penalty that was lazy and needless. Maybe the ref could have let it go? It was a shade marginal and wearing the dad hat and not the hat as the boss of the refs, you wish the officials had let it go. To make it worse, the power play results in a goal.
Then, change hats and back to the rink at 6 PM. Now your soon-to-be 16-year-old is reffing. He calls the same penalty and you silently applaud him for getting it right. Two different moments, two different hats from a personal standpoint but, paradoxically, they are the same emotions. Regardless of the hat, you want your son to do it well and be successful.
Now that McCauley is about to turn 16 -- and Max will be there the next time I blink my eyes -- he's caught up in all the usual things teenage boys are. He wants to make a few bucks to go out with his buddies. He thinks about things like driving and girls.
As for me, well, I remember the days of picking up my baby sons. A minute ago, we were learning how to bumpety bump down the stairs in those Dr. Dentons. I walked down the stairs and then I was helping to get my little ones ready for the school bus and holding their small hands. All the sudden, I was buying their first hockey equipment. Now we are getting their passports so they can fly to far away lands without their mom and me.
It goes by that fast. It is so true that some days may seem long but the years are way too short.
I had an incredible teacher in being a father. My father, Bill Stewart Jr., was a wonderful man and a great dad. I can only hope to have his wisdom and character. My sincerest wish is that someday when they have kids of their own, McCauley and Max can look back at the way I parented them and feel that they learned as much from me as I learned from them. They make me so proud. I hope I make them proud.
Happy birthday, McCauley. I love you and Max more than I can ever say!
McCauley in action
Max
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Paul Stewart holds the distinction of being the first U.S.-born citizen to make it to the NHL as both a player and referee. On March 15, 2003, he became the first American-born referee to officiate in 1,000 NHL games.
Today, Stewart is an officiating and league discipline consultant for the Kontinental Hockey League (KHL) and serves as director of hockey officiating for the Eastern College Athletic Conference (ECAC).
The longtime referee heads Officiating by Stewart, a consulting, training and evaluation service for officials. Stewart also maintains a busy schedule as a public speaker, fund raiser and master-of-ceremonies for a host of private, corporate and public events. As a non-hockey venture, he is the owner of Lest We Forget.
Stewart is currently working with a co-author on an autobiography.
Blogger •Former NHL Referee • 
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