are you fecking with us?

In a perfect world, I think it works out that way, but this isn't a perfect world. You have some clubs like Nashville that have been so deep on D that their #2 or #3 dman would be the #1 on a few other teams...
- hillbillydeluxe

True, never said best on each team. I said top 30 are the number 1s

Toronto doesn't have #1 (reilly could be)
Vancouver doesn't have a #1
Edmonton doesn't have a #1 (larsson could be)
Boston doesn't have a #1 (Chara is washed up)
Philly doesn't have a #1 (Ghost could be down the road)
Islanders don't have a #1 (hamonic could be down the road)
Washington doesn't have a #1 (a bunch of #2's thats why they always choke)
Colorado doesn't have a #1 (barrie isn't a #1 as he sucks at defense)
Columbus doesn't have a #1
New Jersey doesn't have a #1
Carolina doesn't have a #1 (faulk could be down the road)
- classic321

Also true. We have 2 x 2s and a 3

clever bro....well done lol
- SMBDragon

I wish I had a ring now, in 10-15 mins I'll be in poop. GF dropped off a frozen unbaked apple pie this morning with instructions to put in the oven at 4pm, long story short, it's still in the fridge, at least it's defrosted.

If I'm not around in half an hour I might need a search party.

I wish I had a ring now, in 10-15 mins I'll be in poop. GF dropped off a frozen unbaked apple pie this morning with instructions to put in the oven at 4pm, long story short, it's still in the fridge, at least it's defrosted.

If I'm not around in half an hour I might need a search party.
- A_SteamingLombardi

I'd go with I wanted you around before I baked it because it's so much better warm with ice cream.

Are we still fighting?

What have I missed?

I wish I had a ring now, in 10-15 mins I'll be in poop. GF dropped off a frozen unbaked apple pie this morning with instructions to put in the oven at 4pm, long story short, it's still in the fridge, at least it's defrosted.

If I'm not around in half an hour I might need a search party.
- A_SteamingLombardi

blow torch time

or maybe just put it tightly under your arm till she gets there and say it cooled down while waiting

heard this one years ago

what's the difference between the leafs and a cigarette machine?
The cigarette machine has Players


- SMBDragon

That joke is easily 20 years old, since cigarette machines haven't existed in ages.

Remember when every pub and coffee shop had one in the corner?
And malls had ashtrays beside the benches?
And restaurants had non smoking sections in like 1/3 of the establishment?
And people smoked in their cars, with 3 kids in the backseat?

I don't remember it either. Probably due to my lung cancer spreading to my brain from all that second hand smoke as a kid.

Toronto doesn't have #1 (reilly could be)
Vancouver doesn't have a #1
Edmonton doesn't have a #1 (larsson could be)
Boston doesn't have a #1 (Chara is washed up)
Philly doesn't have a #1 (Ghost could be down the road)
Islanders don't have a #1 (hamonic could be down the road)
Washington doesn't have a #1 (a bunch of #2's thats why they always choke)
Colorado doesn't have a #1 (barrie isn't a #1 as he sucks at defense)
Columbus doesn't have a #1
New Jersey doesn't have a #1
Carolina doesn't have a #1 (faulk could be down the road)
- classic321

Oh, is that why?

That joke is easily 20 years old, since cigarette machines haven't existed in ages.

Remember when every pub and coffee shop had one in the corner?
And malls had ashtrays beside the benches?
And restaurants had non smoking sections in like 1/3 of the establishment?
And people smoked in their cars, with 3 kids in the backseat?

I don't remember it either. Probably due to my lung cancer spreading to my brain from all that second hand smoke as a kid.
- Vanoxy

Ashtrays on airplanes.

Oh, is that why?
- Blackstrom2

yes

Im sure theres at least some mammals there....like you said...wild pigs. Just nothing dangerous like panthers

but perhaps with whats there we ourselves are the only mammals to be concerned with lol
- SMBDragon

I should have specified. No native land mammals.
We got possums, pigs, deer now. and some rats.
only native mammals are dolphins and seals.

I should have specified. No native land mammals.
We got possums, pigs, deer now. and some rats.
only native mammals are dolphins and seals.
- dbot

Bats?

Bats?
- golfingsince

sh!t. ok. we got bats probably. never seen em tho.

There's also a good rumour of Moose living in Fjordland.
The story goes that some Canadian brought them over (because, of course!) and they still get sighted from time to time.

Damn WelfareWerewolf , I'm still watching Triumph and some funny skits.

(Tim Meadows as Ben Carson)

The pie is in the oven, she showed me how to do it


I hate being used for my oven.

Vesey drama extended to the weekend. Any player/agent who is so high on himself is a POS in my books.

sh!t. ok. we got bats probably. never seen em tho.

There's also a good rumour of Moose living in Fjordland.
The story goes that some Canadian brought them over (because, of course!) and they still get sighted from time to time.
- dbot

As soon as you said no land mammals I figured bats would be there, so I google it. Only native land mammal in NZ.

The pie is in the oven, she showed me how to do it


I hate being used for my oven.
- A_SteamingLombardi

Dude, this one time a woman used me for my penis......

It was......awesome!!

Are we still fighting?

What have I missed?
- rugdnit

Are frogs asses air tight?

That joke is easily 20 years old, since cigarette machines haven't existed in ages.

Remember when every pub and coffee shop had one in the corner?
And malls had ashtrays beside the benches?
And restaurants had non smoking sections in like 1/3 of the establishment?
And people smoked in their cars, with 3 kids in the backseat?

I don't remember it either. Probably due to my lung cancer spreading to my brain from all that second hand smoke as a kid.
- Vanoxy

hell I remember back in those days my dad getting pulled over....none of us had seatbelts, sister laying down in back window, dad smoking and drinking a beer. Cop has a beer and a smoke with him, they laugh a bit...and he says dont drink too much and off we go.
Cop realized he wasnt drunk and just cooling off on a hot day. Now days he'd have been arrested and since he was a big dude tazered 5 times along the way.

yes and remember they smoked in hospitals too

hell I remember back in those days my dad getting pulled over....none of us had seatbelts, sister laying down in back window, dad smoking and drinking a beer. Cop has a beer and a smoke with him, they laugh a bit...and he says dont drink too much and off we go.
Cop realized he wasnt drunk and just cooling off on a hot day. Now days he'd have been arrested and since he was a big dude tazered 5 times along the way.

yes and remember they smoked in hospitals too
- SMBDragon

Did you grow up in Mexico ?

The pie is in the oven, she showed me how to do it


I hate being used for my oven.
- A_SteamingLombardi

the shame the shame....maybe theres a support group for that

via reddit

Satan is wandering about hell when he decides to visit two Americans sharing a cell. He finds them groaning in agony.
“Please, Satan, could you turn down the heat?" Satan laughs and slams the door shut.
He goes to the cell next door, where two Canadians are held.
Satan finds them roasting marshmallows and cooking steaks on the floor.
“What are you doing?" Satan asked.
“Well, it’s so cold in Canada, that this heat is actually kind of refreshing. So we thought we’d enjoy it!"
Satan stormed off angrily, he’d never heard of such a thing! He decided to crank the heat. That would show those Canadians.
But when he returned to their cell, he found them lounging in bathing suits.
“How is this possible?" Satan bellowed.
“Well, Canada is so cold, this heat is kind of nice! It’s like being on vacation!" Satan was furious.
“I know!" he thought to himself, “I’ll turn down the heat so low they’ll be frozen solid! It will be utter torment!" Satan snickered to himself, and lowered the heat as much as he could.
When Satan returned to the Canadian’s cell, he found them celebrating, and cheering for joy. “Now what?" he demanded.
“Well, come on, Satan!" the Canadians said, in between whoops and yells, “Everyone knows that when hell freezes over it means the Leafs have won the cup!"
- dbot

BTW good job trying to insert humour here today

Dude, this one time a woman used me for my penis......

It was......awesome!!
- golfingsince

only once huh
will aunt mary ever be the same?

Did you grow up in Mexico ?
- VANTEL

nope ...just was a different world back then.... till it all turned to a PC police state