One of the comical and sometimes annoying things about watching my son play pee-wee hockey is listening to the moms and dads screaming instructions to their kids.

The annoying part is sometimes its abruptly ear-bending loud and much of the time they have no idea what the hell they're yelling about.

The comical part is knowing that the kids on the ice can't hear them. Had they ever been on the ice or bench during competition they'd probably realize this. Yeah, I know it’s any good mom and dad’s God-given right and privilege to scream like a maniac. They forked over the 35-hundred bucks for little Billy's ice time and his suit of armor, and they love little Billy, so scream they will.

But it's like telling your dog to stop digging up the flowers in the garden. When you scold the dog, "Damn it, this is the last time Scooter, if you don't stop digging up my flowers and veggies, I'm gonna tie you up in the garage", the dog actually hears "brah ruh, ree rah roe ranng Scooter, eet ufa op, eepy roop tye rah rah roey rupa reee rah ronge."

These parents don't get it. "Skate Billy!", "Somebody get him!", "Go get the puck!" and "Hey ref, where's the call there!" combine with all the other pleadings, screeches, and beggings, and turn into mommy-daddy white noise. It's an echoic din with no meaning, a blanket of sound hanging over the ice surface. The hollered verbiage that doesn't bounce off the glass backwards, ricochets up amongst the other nonsense, off the ceiling, and cascades harmlessly down upon non-listening ears.

There is however one thing that IS great about the screaming this year, my son's second season in pee-wee; none of this yelling from moms and dads is directed at each other, when on many occasions last year it was. This is because USA hockey eliminated body checking at the pee wee level this past summer.

Now I'm no fan of pansy hockey, whether the player is an NHLer, a college kid, or a high school freshman. It's a physical game even inadvertently. If you're afraid of the puck or the other people on the ice, take up golf. There's an intrinsic roughness and it bugs me to watch players, really at any level, to shy away.

That said; there is definitely no reason for these younger kids to be hitting. Last season, AT LEAST three times a game, there was a stoppage as the coach had to come out on the ice to check on a fallen/injured player. A high percentage of the kids played frightened, not because they were necessarily intrinsic softees, but because for a few of the aforementioned idiot parents (and coaches), especially in a non-traditional market, hockey is football on ice.

The goal for many wasn't for Billy to advance the puck and/or score, it was to deliver the killer hit. "Hit him!", "Get him!", "Bury him when you get a chance!" were commonplace, and when a 12-year-old advanced pubescent bonehead would skate halfway across the ice to annihilate an 11-year-old pre-pubescent halfling with his back turned, it was a bad scene all around. Even for me, one who has seen literally every form of violence at a hockey rink, major league, minor league, and amateur, it was a bit much.

Let’s face it, football mom and dad number-one take exception to football mom and dad number-two when the number-twos cheer and clap wildly after number-ones’ little lovey got plowed from behind on a boarding hit.

Parents got angry, kids got hurt, more kids played with visible fear, and many coaches came across as blood-thirsty Neanderthals.

How's that for player development?

There were glove punch fights every third game last season; this season there's been one total glove punch.

So am I, Mr Old-time hockey, suggesting the same should be done for 13 and 14-year olds in Bantam, I don't know. I mean, they have to learn to hit (properly one would hope) at some point. All I know is; it’s a hell of a lot more pleasant going to the rink this season.

Yes, there is still senseless high-volume blather coming from the stands, but at least this season they yell with love, as opposed to with just the opposite.


Follow Rob on twitter @simmerpuck and look for something new here about every-other-day.

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