The Predictions business is for the fools. Make enough of them, and you're bound to get one right. And that's all you gotta do!
Check this out:
From September 30 2016
Quick Predictions:
(Without Miss Cleo by my side, I doubt any of these will come true, but here goes...)
1. McDavid Wins Scoring Tile.
2. Taylor Hall comes in second.
3. Flyers are a good team; make playoffs.
4. Blackhawks Miss Playoffs.
5. Edmonton wins the West.
The #1 Prediction was 100% correct. They laughed when I said I was gonna pick him first in the hockey pool. They said it couldn't be done. It was done, as predicted by your nearly psychic and totally modest friend/genius, Big Jim. (note, I now refer to myself in the third person as 'Big Jim.')
All the big prognosticators do it.
Taylor Hall? Injured. not my fault, dog. Flyers? Only missed by 3.5 wins. Blackhawks? They needed to have the league's 3rd highest PDO in order to win the west. Which they barely won. Give me a break. Edmonton? Close enough considering most other people picked them to miss the Playoffs?
All Hail the hockey master!!
Just kidding. I'm the same guy who is currently predicting a Calgary / Toronto Final and an Auston Matthews Hart, so take this with a grain of salt. Even if it is scary accurate! *
Need more evidence? What about that time last August when Miss Cleo contacted me from beyond the grave for one final prediction?
August 1st 2016
MINUS: Ooooh Child, it is with a heavy heart I must pay tribute to my favorite late-night psychic and frequent fake-collaborator, Miss Cleo who passed away this past week.
Sadly, Miss Cleo only made 24 cents per minute while the Psychic Alliance raked in billions from innocent idiots. In case it isn't clear, I was only pretending to know her and she actually lived comfortably in California and not in the parking lot behind the Dominoes near my house.
She left me with one final prediction: "Child, you will meet a new physic friend. But for now, bet all your money on the Blue Jackets."
She KNEW the Blue Jackets were a 100 point team before anyone else. She always did love John Tortorella!
What about these sweet picks?
October 2, 2016
PLUS: The Accuracy of these Predictions:
Hart: McDavid
Norris: OEL Art Ross: McDavid Calder: Matthews
Selke: Kopitar Coach: Who Cares? Stupid Award Lady Bying: Who Cares, Stupid Award Host of Award Show: Kevin Spacey and Gary Bettman, co-hosting as each other.
Musical Guest: William Hung
West: Edmonton
East: Florida Cup: Nashville (assuming the get a goalie) vs Florida
Hey Not bad, right?
By my count, that's at least eight or nine correct predictions. Sure, I was off a little bit about the Panthers, and the Predators only made it to the Cup, but still it's pretty clear I should become a professional prognosticator.
Just send me nine bucks on Paypal and I'll make you a prediction about anything you want. If you need to know what's going to happen this season, I already told you last week. But just to recap:
Matthews: Hart, Art Ross, Richard
Leafs: Cup Champs
Flames : Cup Losers
Strome: Calder
Coyotes: Playoffs
Capitals: No Playoffs
East Champs: Hurricanes
West Champs: Flames
Let the good times roll!
*the legal team made me put that disclaimer in. Don't believe it. Take these predictions with absolutely no grains of salt at all.
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