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Forums :: My HockeyBuzz :: Boston Bruins Identity Crisis?
Author Message
JosephOchs
Boston Bruins
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Joined: 02.26.2015

Feb 26 @ 6:00 AM ET
This is that wonderful time of year when talking heads like yours truly (those of us who weren’t talented enough to “let our play do the talking”) pour over the thirty teams in the NHL to identify the “Buyers” and “Sellers” prior to the March 2 trade deadline. And of course, every year we have teams that don’t conveniently fit into those two categories. Take the Calgary Flames and Florida Panthers for example: Both teams have been able to hit the fast-forward button on their respective rebuilds, and find themselves firmly entrenched in a race for the playoffs. Each have ample cap room, a desire to add veteran help, and a steadfast refusal to mortgage part of their future for a (seemingly) likely first round exit at the hands of a more imposing, complete team. But what if a team found itself on the playoff bubble, pressed firmly against the cap, with a rapidly-closing championship window and not a trace of a team identity/

Boston Bruins: You are on the clock.

Going back to the 2007-2008 Season (Claude Julien’s first behind the bench, and GM Peter Chiarelli’s second in the press box) the Bruins have been postseason stalwarts. They’ve traded away or been unable to resign snipers (Kessel, Seguin, Horton, Iginla), moved on from a Vezina Trophy winning goaltender (Tim Thomas), and gone through numerous stretches of frustrating inability to put the puck in the net. But through it all, they’ve always been one thing: difficult to play against. Teams that are difficult to play against are also (historically) difficult to beat four times in seven games once the playoffs roll around. “Built for the playoffs” is the phrase we use to siphon anxiety when a team like the Bruins or Los Angeles Kings falter at points during the regular season. This type of team is big, physical, and unafraid to remind their opponent exactly whom they’re playing against. They might be the slower team in Game One of a series, but after hitting everything in sight for games on end they’re rarely the slower team once the puck drops for Game Six or Seven.

These Bruins? Not so much.

They strike fear in the hearts of no one.

They don’t have the finesse of Detroit or Chicago.

They don’t have the speed of Montreal or New York (Rangers).

With few exceptions, they’re a team comprised of fringe third-liners and bottom pairing defensemen. One would have to go back to the 2006-2007 iteration of the Black and Gold (see also:Dave Lewis Nightmare) to see the lads look so uninspiring and lost.

So…..now what?

Some say the Bruins should trade Tuukka Rask; a suggestion I won’t even dignify with a response.

Some say to trade old man Chara and his $7 million cap hit. But has it really been his play (or contract) that’s to blame? He’s clearly not what he used to be at thirty-eight years old, but he’s still unquestionably a top-pairing d-,man, and those don’t grow on trees. Think of it this way: Johnny Boychuck will be an Unrestricted Free Agent by season’s end, at which point he will ABSOLUTELY secure a contract from someone which will pay him $6 million per season. He’s a terrific player, and one the Bruins (and yours truly) have missed dearly this season. Is he Zdeno Chara? Not even close. Not even at this stage of Chara’s career. How does that $7 million cap hit look now?

The problems, as I see them, are threefold: A knee-jerk reaction to tweaking the team’s genetic makeup, a poor history of scouting, drafting and development, and bad…bad contracts. First, the former.

A Second Round exit at the hands of the hated Montreal Canadiens left many searching for answers (as well as a fist-sized hole in my bathroom door. There are photos, I have proof). Many began to cite a need for the team to “get with the times,” and get away from the bruising style of play that often sent a Bruin to the sin-bin, allowing the younger, quicker Canadiens to skate even more freely around the Black and Gold. But just as it was in 2011, the Bruins found themselves on home ice for Game 7, with a chance to advance to the Conference Finals while members of the Bleu, Blanc, et Rouge Yelped “Best Late-Night Poutine in Montreal” from the comfort of their silent private jet. in 2011, the Bruins caught the breaks, and Nathan Horton’s overtime goal paved the way for a one-way trip to Titletown. In 2014, the Bruins hit approximately 47 posts, forgot to show up for two games, and it was Les Habitants who were moving on. As Jeffrey “The Dude” Lebowski can attest, ” Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes the bear eats you.” The 2014 Bruins did not catch the breaks, so there we were…criticizing everything.

In two offseasons the Bruins lost Nathan Horton, Jarome Iginla, Shawn Thornton, Johnny Boychuck and Andrew Ference. That’s a Hell of a lot of grit and toughness, and the Bruins didn’t attempt to replenish any of it, instead hoping that Loui Eriksson and Reilly Smith could be “two-way players,” that Adam McQuaid and Kevan Miller could be steadying, presences on the blue line. They were told the League was changing, and they bought in hook, line and sinker.

Allow me to use the NFL to prove a point.

Listen to any commentary or chatter on the NFL and you’ll be reminded 165 times that the NFL is now a “passing league.” Running backs (by and large) no longer carry a first-round draft grade, teams load up on pass rushers and cornerbacks in the the draft, spread formations are all the rage, etc. So why is it that a team like the Seattle Seahawks, with their no-name wide receiver corps, have been to each of the past two Super Bowls, winning one and coming one yard and thirty seconds from another? Maybe it’s because there’s something to be said for metaphorically (and literally) punching your opponent in the mouth. Maybe your receivers aren’t feeling as quick and fresh after you put the crown of your helmet in their ribs every time they go across the middle. Maybe their lighting fast corners don’t feel so quick and sprite after they’ve had to make their seventh tackle on your 230 pound running back, as he carries the ball for the thirtieth time that afternoon. There’s a swagger that comes from physically dominating your opponent. It’s a confidence that can’t be replaced, not even by statistics. It’s the same confidence that carried the Bruins to the 2011 Stanley Cup Championship against a quicker, faster and more talented Canucks team. The same confidence that carried another Bruins team to a Stanley Cup Final (2013) a President’s Trophy (2014) and a number one seed in the East another year (2008). Maybe teams should let the league change around them, and then exploit all the new weaknesses that come with the “changing of the times.”

Now, the young blood.

The Los Angeles Kings are the NHL’s crown jewel of roster rejuvenation. If a team is to be a perennial Cup contender, several roster spots need to be occupied by productive players on Entry Level Deals. When a team wins the Cup, it does so because some of its players come through in the clutch. When players come through in the clutch, the cost of keeping them skyrockets, meaning they price themselves out of town. The revolving door of young, cheap talent has never been more imperative to continued success in this league than it is currently. So, without further ado, a quick look at some Kings and their respective cap hits:

Tanner Pearson- $735,833

Tyler Toffoli- $716,667

Jordan Nolan- $700,00

Alec Martinez- $1,100,000

Jake Muzzin- $1,000,000

Brayden McNabb- $650,000

Muzzin and Martinez play Top 4 minutes on the blue line, with a combined cap hit of just over $2 million. Pearson and Toffoli play Top 9 minutes overall, but spend five-on-five as two-thirds of the teams successful second line, for a cap hit of less than $1.5 million. Jordan Nolan is a big, physical 4th liner who’s battle-tested and has two Stanley Cup rings to his name. Alec Martinez scored both the Western Conference Final and Stanley Cup Final winning goals in 2014. When a team is drafting and developing this well it’s easier to stomach one or two overpriced contracts. Now, let’s look at the Bruins:

David Pastrnak- $925,000

Brian Ferlin- $875,000

Ryan Spooner- $760,000

Jordan Caron- $600,000

Craig Cunningham- $600,000

Dougie Hamilton- $894,000

I don’t need to list the available statistics to show just how far the Bruins are lagging behind the competition in this critical area. Furthermore, hockeysfuture.com has the Bruins listed as having the 22nd best farm system in the NHL, so it’s not like help is on the way anytime soon. All this, never mind the following (part three):

Milan Lucic- $6,000,000

Loui Eriksson- $4,250,000

Chris Kelly- $3,000,000

Gregory Campbell- $1,600,000

Daniel Paille- $1,300,000

For those of us mildly competent at math (with five minutes to spare), that boils down to five forwards (four of whom where on the 2011 Championship team) accounting for forty-two goals in sixty games (as of this article) for a cost of over $16 million. That’s over $380,000 per goal. That’s also not good. If this were an investment of mine I’d douse myself in gasoline and lighter fluid and find the nearest brick oven pizzeria.

Just for fun: A mini list of forwards who make less money than Milan Lucic:

John Tavares

Marian Hossa

Tyler Seguin

Gabriel Landeskog

Jamie Benn

Jacub Voracek

Ryan Kesler

Can anyone out there honestly say at this point that they wouldn’t trade Lucic for any of these guys? He’s a Top Six forward….as long as his two linemates (Krejci, Horton/Iginla) are better than he is. Let him go out to crash and bang and pot a few rebounds. When he’s been expected to carry the load he’s fallen flat on his face. It’s not his fault the Bruins pay him $6 million per season, but…..the Bruins pay him $6 million per season.

Loui Eriksson is a Top Six forward….on a team destined to miss the playoffs. As it is, he’s being paid over four million dollars to be good on the third line. This doesn’t make him a bad person, teammate or player…it just means he’s overpaid.

Chris Kelly is the most handsomely-compensated fourth-liner in the NHL (au revoir, Mike Richards), regardless of where Julien chooses to play him.

Gregory Campbell (for all of his heart) couldn’t lick a lollipop, much less his opponent in a fight. I refuse to believe the Bruins couldn’t find someone half as expensive to skate their butt off on the PK, while losing every fight they engage in and scoring 7 goals per season.

Dan Paille couldn’t put the puck in the ocean from the wet sand. Scientists at MIT proved this last week. He makes over $1 million per year.

"So what’s your point?" is a question I’m sure you’re asking yourself at this juncture. My point is this: The Bruins aren’t buyers, nor are they sellers. They’re in the hospital, waiting for a complete blood transfusion. This isn’t a team that’s one or two rentals away from the Stanley Cup, it’s a team that needs a complete shakeup. If that leads to a Cup this year, wonderful. If it merely removes some bad contracts this year while setting the team to legitimately compete again next year, that works too. But I’d hate to see the team put lipstick on a pig, and think that adding Chris Stewart or Curtis Glencross for picks and prospects to the bloated visage of the 2014-2015 Boston Bruins will achieve anything more than a Second Round loss. Rather than focus on how to categorize what the Bruins are this year, Peter Chiarelli needs to figure out what this team should look like moving forward, indefinitely, because the current look isn’t all that flattering. As far as this writer is concerned, if your name isn’t Bergeron, Krejci, Rask or Chara you’d be well-served to keep a packed duffel bag near the door.

Boston Bruins: You’re on the clock.
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 16 @ 6:26 PM ET
never thought of it this way
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 17 @ 9:22 PM ET
never thought of it this way
- Shutdown

maybe its time
watsonnostaw
Atlanta Thrashers
Location: Dude has all the personality of a lump of concrete. Just a complete lizard.
Joined: 06.26.2006

Mar 28 @ 6:35 PM ET
maybe its time
- Pie

time for what?
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 6:36 PM ET
time for what?
- watsonnostaw

Shutdown to think of it that way
watsonnostaw
Atlanta Thrashers
Location: Dude has all the personality of a lump of concrete. Just a complete lizard.
Joined: 06.26.2006

Mar 28 @ 6:54 PM ET
Shutdown to think of it that way
- Pie

Shutdown to think would be a good start
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 28 @ 6:58 PM ET
Shutdown to think would be a good start
- watsonnostaw

WOAH-HO-HO

watch out for this guy, he's dishin' out VENOM
watsonnostaw
Atlanta Thrashers
Location: Dude has all the personality of a lump of concrete. Just a complete lizard.
Joined: 06.26.2006

Mar 28 @ 6:58 PM ET
WOAH-HO-HO

watch out for this guy, he's dishin' out VENOM

- Shutdown

settle down your marine life first sparky
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 28 @ 6:59 PM ET
settle down your marine life first sparky
- watsonnostaw

i swear you speak in code half the time
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 7:12 PM ET
i swear you speak in code half the time
- Shutdown

I'm guessing swimmers but I could be wrong
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 28 @ 7:13 PM ET
I'm guessing swimmers but I could be wrong
- Pie

he's too smart for me, which brings us back to his original point
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 7:14 PM ET
Shutdown to think would be a good start
- watsonnostaw

youre welcome for the lob
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 7:14 PM ET
he's too smart for me, which brings us back to his original point
- Shutdown

Its an in your face wenom that is enjoyable to watch but not taste
watsonnostaw
Atlanta Thrashers
Location: Dude has all the personality of a lump of concrete. Just a complete lizard.
Joined: 06.26.2006

Mar 28 @ 7:23 PM ET
he's too smart for me, which brings us back to his original point
- Shutdown

i read your location (frank)stick
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 28 @ 7:24 PM ET
i read your location (frank)stick
- watsonnostaw

GOD DAMNIT
watsonnostaw
Atlanta Thrashers
Location: Dude has all the personality of a lump of concrete. Just a complete lizard.
Joined: 06.26.2006

Mar 28 @ 7:24 PM ET
youre welcome for the lob
- Pie

you are scoring multiple assists this evening
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 7:31 PM ET
you are scoring multiple assists this evening
- watsonnostaw

The bourbon I had while reading skippyjohn jones to the kids for bedtime is hiding my blush
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 28 @ 7:35 PM ET
what kind of bourbon
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 7:40 PM ET
what kind of bourbon
- Shutdown

Woodfords. is good
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 28 @ 7:43 PM ET
Woodfords. is good
- Pie

yes. very.
carry on.
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 8:01 PM ET
yes. very.
carry on.

- Shutdown

The Evan Williams single barrel is nice too, but they are a mess with the 'wax' top
watsonnostaw
Atlanta Thrashers
Location: Dude has all the personality of a lump of concrete. Just a complete lizard.
Joined: 06.26.2006

Mar 28 @ 8:03 PM ET
The Evan Williams single barrel is nice too, but they are a mess with the 'wax' top
- Pie

the wax is to make anal insertion quick and "painless"
Shutdown
Carolina Hurricanes
Location: a fat guy sitting on a toilet with no back and his head resting on his balls pic, NC
Joined: 04.06.2008

Mar 28 @ 8:04 PM ET
The Evan Williams single barrel is nice too, but they are a mess with the 'wax' top
- Pie

havent ever had it

i put up a list of what i've tried in the bourbon thread. seek it out. add recommendations. or just tell me here.
watsonnostaw
Atlanta Thrashers
Location: Dude has all the personality of a lump of concrete. Just a complete lizard.
Joined: 06.26.2006

Mar 28 @ 8:05 PM ET
havent ever had it

i put up a list of what i've tried in the bourbon thread. seek it out. add recommendations. or just tell me here.

- Shutdown



you never had it up your ass? or you never had it as a beverage?
Pie
Montreal Canadiens
Location: taking the low road
Joined: 10.14.2006

Mar 28 @ 8:06 PM ET
you never had it up your ass? or you never had it as a beverage?
- watsonnostaw

This is a question for Richard
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