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An emotional Tim Thomas address what caused him to leave hockey

December 13, 2019, 10:07 AM ET [13 Comments]
Anthony Travalgia
Boston Bruins Blogger • RSSArchiveCONTACT
With the rich history of Boston sports comes several iconic sports moments.

Adam Vinatieri’s Super Bowl winning kicks, Dave Roberts stealing second base in the American League Championship Series and John Havlicek stealing the ball to name a few.

Tim Thomas’ stick save on Steve Downie in Game 5 of the 2011 Eastern Conference Finals is another of those iconic Boston sports moments.

After spending the 2013-14 season with the Florida Panthers and Dallas Stars, Thomas went off the radar, retiring from the NHL.

For years, it was rumors about bunkers, rumors about where he was living, chatter about his political views and memories off what ended up as one of the better underdog stories in the history of sports.

As the Bruins clawed their way to Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final last season, each playoff home game’s pre-game festivities would conclude with the “banner captain” waving a Bruins flag to get the crowd going.

From Rob Gronkowski to Marc Savard to Bobby Orr, some of the best to play in Boston’s long sports history were on display.

But there was one name, one person, one Stanley Cup Champion, Bruins fans really wanted to see: Tim Thomas.

Thomas remained dark and silent.

This past September it was announced that Thomas would be inducted into the US Hockey Hall of Fame. It was then, Thomas made his first pubic comments since his retirement in 2014.

Speaking with reporters Thursday prior to the evening’s induction ceremony, Thomas opened up in regards to the battle he has gone through since leaving the game of hockey.

Thomas’ career is one many goalies who walk into the National Hockey League dream about. Two Vezina Trophies, a Conn Smythe and a Stanley Cup. Thomas even represented Team USA at the 2010 Olympic Games.

But thanks to the absolute hell he went through post-hockey, Thomas went through a period of time where he regretted everything he had done in the game of hockey.

The Olympics, the Stanley Cup, none of it mattered.

“I couldn’t communicate with anybody. For a few years, I didn’t call my Dad. I didn’t talk to anybody,” an emotional Thomas said. “There was a time period where, yeah, I hated the game, so to speak. I didn’t sit there and (say). ‘I hate it.’ My rebound effect was, ‘This wasn’t worth it.’ That’s where I was then.”

In Thomas’ nine seasons with the Bruins, he never officially missed any time with a concussion, but Thomas says it was a game in 2013 when he was with the Panthers that changed his life.

He was concussed in the contest.

"I woke up the next morning after it and I couldn't decide what I wanted to eat, where I wanted to go," Thomas said. "I couldn't plan a schedule. I survived following the team schedule the rest of the year and just made it through that season."

Despite cracking a handful of jokes as he chatted with the media, Thomas could not hold back the tears as he discussed some of the darkest days of his life.

“I would say I gave up at least 100 times … or tried to. I never came that near to taking my own life,” said Thomas.

“There was always a barrier there for me. I only really thought about it a couple times, and then got scared and pulled myself back because I had enough self-control … everyone’s different, you know? … but, yeah, it was a frustrating few years.”

Thomas revealed that a year after leaving the game he got what is called a CereScan. This scan measures the blood flow to the brain.

“Then a year after I stopped playing I got what is called a CereScan, a scan to measure the blood flow of your brain, very accurately, using radioactive isotopes, and two-thirds of my brain was getting less than 5 percent blood flow, and the other third was averaging about 50 percent,” said Thomas.

“So, if you can put those numbers in and really think through what that means to where I was, that’s where I was.”

Although talking about what he had gone through was difficult for him, it’s clear Thomas is in a much better state than he was several years ago. As dark as those days were for Thomas and his family, he can look back on it as a lesson learned and hopes that his story someday helps someone, anyone, avoid what he went through.

“Where I am today is past that. And I ended up learning so many things from that experience. It brought me tighter with my family. It taught me a value for life and a value for my brain that I’ve never had before,” said Thomas. “And I have appreciation for everything that I never had before, so I don’t regret anything.”

Thomas and several other of his Hall of Fame inductees made a surprise appearance at Capital One Arena Wednesday night for the Bruins contest with the Capitals. The evening provided Thomas the opportunity to catch up with some former teammates and some of that staff he worked with during his tenure in Boston.

Zdeno Chara, Patrice Bergeron, Tuukka Rask, Brad Marchand and David Krejci were all teammates of Thomas on the Bruins Stanley Cup winning team in 2011.

Seeing those guys was something Thomas enjoyed.

“I had a blast seeing those guys,” Thomas said. “I was going to say I enjoyed myself way more than I thought I would, but I knew I’d enjoy myself. I just didn’t know how much it would make me feel good to be around those guys again, even for a short period.”

Had Thomas not been elected into the US Hockey Hall of Fame, who knows if we would have ever heard from Thomas again. He wasn’t going to tell his story until he was ready.

“I didn’t want to talk about this. I didn’t want to talk. I didn’t want to tell the world this stuff. Not till I felt ready, and I didn’t feel ready. But here I am,” Thomas said.

With the world of hockey back into his life, albeit for a few hours, reminders of what once was came back to him.

“Being welcomed back into the arms of the hockey family, so to speak, has been great. It’s reminded me of all the great people that I crossed paths with all throughout my career,” a tearful Thomas said.

“It’s been very impactful.”

Will this induction into the Hockey Hall of Fame open the door to more public appearances from Thomas?

Only time will tell.
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