Follow @james_tanner123 Well you know you're deep into the summer doldrums when the team's announcement of new jerseys prompts you to hop online and blog about it.
Because OMG girlfriend, what could be more exciting? Other than, you know, just about anything.
To be honest, my first reaction was "Why don't you remove the Y and IES when you pluralize the word jersey, like you do with nearly all other Y words?"
I briefly considered writing an entire post about the intricacies of grammar, but then realized that that would totally be construed as trolling for hits, because nothing says "click bait" like grammar.
But if you are wondering, the real reason is because you just add the S when the letter before the Y is a vowel, like for instance with the word journey. Which, did somebody say Journey?
Hey here's some breaking news: South Detroit is actually Canada.
Anyways, here are some reactions to the Coyotes change of jersey:
Jesus: "It doesn't matter what jersey you wear, I still love you."
Gary Bettman: "There is no conclusive link between what jersey you wear and concussions."
Tanner: "The link between jerseys and performance is only based on confirmation bias and outdated thinking. Clearly what you really need are more puck moving defensemen."
Jerry Seinfeld: "What's the deal with these new jerseys?"
Marian Hossa: "Give me one of those bad boys and you'll be in the Cup Final in no time" (because he plays in the Final every year).
Lil John* "What? Yeah I'll buy a new Coyotes Jersey."
David Letterman: "So uh, tell me, is that yer ah new jersey?"
Twitter/Comments Section: "Can I be the first to make a Nordiques/Las Vegas/Seattle joke?"
A Skeptic: "How much rebranding can you do, before you just accept that winning is the only kind of rebranding that works?"
Tanner: "It wouldn't kill someone to send me one of these, preferably a dark OEL"
Glendale City Councilman: "They better say Glendale Coyotes or I'm going to tell the mayor."
Martin Hanzal: "I could definitely see myself getting injured in one of these."
I could go all day here, but I'll stop myself. Let us just say that I don't really agree with the move to change jerseys because I think the current jerseys are awesome and among the best in the league, especially the red one.
In the end though, who really cares? I'd be much happier with the re-signing of Boedker.
Also,If you live in Arizona, and you want to, you can go visit the Gila River Arena at 3pm local time on draft day (June 26) and attend the team's draft party, which would be fun. Probably.
*My contract states that all cultural references must be at least six years out of date. Also, clearly these are all made up.
Thanks for reading.