The Sabres are depressing.
Rather than wallow in the misery that was last night’s loss to the Montreal Canadiens, let’s have some fun and get into the hard work of ranking prospects ahead of the 2022 NHL Draft. Sure, maybe it’s a little early to get into draft prognostication with the season not even three-quarters finished. Conversely, the Sabres are donezo and out of it, so it makes sense to start looking toward the draft because that's usually the high point of the Sabres calendar.
Many professional hockey analysts are committed to the craft of meticulously scouting players by analyzing film and scouting players in person, which in turn allows them to rank prospective players through traditional means. Craig Button and his ilk do their thing by ranking the players using things like “skill… and “ability… to create their draft rankings. This one is a little different.
We’re going to draft potential candidates based on the elite quality of their names. The names you see here are all draft-eligible players this summer. Without further ado, here is the mock first round of the 2022 Elite Name Draft:
1.) Boston Buckberger
2.) Dennis Good Bogg
3.) Justin Lies
4.) Bogdan Hodass
5.) Jack Hughes (not that one)
6.) Conor Geekie
7.) Cruz Lucius
8.) Jordin Palmer (not Josh Allen’s QB coach)
9.) Rutger McGroarty
10.) Zam Plante
11.) Alex Bump
12.) Finn Loftus
13.) Marek Soukup
14.) Dylan Godbout
15.) Ryan Hopkins (no Nugent)
16.) Zaccharya Wisdom
17.) Grayson Badger
18.) Elias Pettersson (not that one)
19.) Ethan Bono
20.) Charles-Edward Gravel
21.) Gibson Homer
22.) Luca Del Bel Belluz
23.) Jagger Firkus
24.) Jimmy Snuggerud
25.) Cole Spicer
26.) Ralf Rollinger
27.) Jordan Dumais
28.) Wyatt Wurst
29.) Hobie Hedquist
30.) Cade Littler
31.) Landon Sim
32.) Liam Steele
Justin Lies entered the season as the consensus number-one overall pick but he has seen his draft stock fall down as far as four or five on many draft boards. There’s still time for him to raise his standing before all is said and done.
If Bogdan Hodass falls to the Sabres who are likely to pick around five in the coming draft, that would be an incredible steal for them. He has everything you’re looking for in a top-five talent, and he almost certainly would be a top-two pick this year if not for the elite attributes of Boston Buckberger and Dennis Good Bogg.
Is it too soon to take Cruz Lucius at five? It’s certainly debatable because he might not have the “wow factor,… but the fundamentals are all there and you’re looking at a solid contributor for many years. That’s the name of a good Bond villain right there.
The Sabres will also have a good look at some talent in the bottom part of the first round where they hold selections from the Vegas Golden Knights and Florida Panthers. Hobie Hedquist may be available along with Wyatt Wurst. If they were to package those two picks, they could move up and select Elias Pettersson (not that one) or Grayson Badger.
There are plenty of options available. While some fans are in favor of trading one of their later two first round picks for an established veteran presence like Greg McKegg, it would be impossible to do if Ethan Bono or Jagger Firkus are still on the board.
Are there any snubs? Players ranked too low or too high? Let me know in the comments.