The Scoville scale is a pepper spiciness rating system based on the number of heat-producing capsaicinoids in a given pepper species, and this rating in turn ranks the heat of peppers from the ubiquitous bell pepper up to the mighty Carolina reaper pepper. The concentration of these capsaicinoids in a pepper is what determines whether a given vegetable adds a pleasant crunch to a delicious dinner, or whether it turns your mouth into a fiery chasm that can only be extinguished by the heavy consumption of lactose-containing products.
Today, this blog will offer a Scoville-scale smorgasbord of spicy takes for the second half of the season by applying this same scale to possible developments for the Sabres and their march to the end of the season on April 29th when they close their regular-season schedule against the Chicago Blackhawks.
We begin, as does the Scoville scale, with the garden variety bell pepper:
7.) The Sabres will finish between 28th and 30th (Scoville Scale: Bell)
Simply put, it’s hard to see the Sabres “catching… the Montreal Canadiens or Arizona Coyotes for the bottom two spots, even if Carey Price is skating again. They’re right in that 28th-30th place wheelhouse and they appear to want to stay there based on most available metrics. Likewise, they don’t appear to be a candidate to excel over the course of the last three meaningless months of the season.
6.) Colin Miller fetches the best return for the Sabres at the deadline (Scoville Scale: Poblano)
Right-handed defensemen are some of the most valuable commodities at the trade deadline every year. The 2005-06 Sabres and Darcy Regier can attest to the fact that you can never have too many defenseman who have experience at the NHL level. Miller is also having a nice season for the blue and gold with 12 points in 32 games. He can add a touch of scoring and also a dash of physicality to any team in search of a defenseman who can reasonably play in a 2nd or 3rd pairing situation without looking out of place. Miller is the kind of TDL acquisition teams want. See the fourth item on this listing for more on the topic.
5.) Jeff Skinner leads the team in goals (Scoville Scale: Cayenne)
The Sabres veteran has 16 goals on the season and his only real competition for the goal-scoring title is noted tall man and surprisingly good center Tage Thompson, who currently sits at 14 goals. Skinner is currently scoring on 12 percent of his shots, while Thompson is scoring on 10.8 percent of his shots so either one is as likely as the other for regression. Tie goes to the runner, or in this case, the veteran player who has scored 40 goals in this league and has proven that he can do it.
4.) Victor Olofsson is not traded at the deadline (Scoville Scale: Scotch Bonnett)
Olofsson has not scored a goal since Halloween. The Swedish sniper has seen a precipitous decline in scoring since his rookie season in which he scored 20 goals while being the trigger man for Jack Eichel. Last year he scored 13, and this year he has scored 5 goals. Unless Olofsson goes on an absolute heater prior to the deadline, it makes little sense to sell on the scorer at a low point when he could be packaged at the draft for a better return. Olofsson is a package player, not a trade deadline player. Now this could change if he does start to light it up.
3.) Casey Mittelstadt finishes the season with the highest point percentage on the team (Scoville Scale: Red Savina)
Mittelstadt has had a completely disappointing season this year when comparing the preseason hopes with the reality of the situation. Mittelstadt was seen as the prohibitive favorite to occupy the top pivot position before the season began and injuries derailed his campaign. Currently Tage Thompson leads the team in points percentage with .73 points per game, but that could easily change if Mittelstadt is ever able to come back healthy and ready to play this season. With 2 points in 7 games, the Minnesota native could easily flip the script on the situation and fire off a few multi-point games and catapult himself into the points percentage race if-and-when he manages to get off the injured list. Newcomer Alex Tuch is still the prohibitive favorite, though, if we're counting a small 13-game sample size.
2.) Devon Levi takes the Sabres crease and never gives it back (Scoville Scale: Ghost)
The premise of this idea is that the Canadians medal in front of Hobey Baker candidate Devon Levi, he turns pro after the NCAA season concludes, and he starts a few games for the Sabres after the amateur season concludes. To hear former Sabres goalie Marty Biron tell it, there’s little doubt that Levi will turn pro following his season at Northeastern. With Ukko-Pekka Luukkonen consistently battling injuring issues, and with no one else pushing him from the lower ranks with the exception of Erik Portillo, Devon Levi could shock the Sabres world and take over the mantle of number one goalie before his 21st birthday if he is indeed given some games at the end of the season. Now certainly, 20 is young, but it should be mentioned that Carter Hart played 30 games for the Flyers at 20 years old.
1.) Ownership changes hands (Scoville level: Carolina Reaper)
There has been a lot of smoke on this one. Andrew Peters – while not saying this is a possibility – did say that a source has hinted at “major changes… for the Sabres. I have heard rumblings on the potential for a total or partial minority ownership change for over a year. Posters here have said similar things. What exactly it would mean (and indeed if it will happen) is a matter of conjecture at this point and it deserves to be met with the highest possible Scoville rating until it can be substantiated. Still, it feels like a legitimate possibility even if it is a longshot.
By all means, please post your Sabres hot takes in the comment section and feel free to roast these predictions.