Rather than write another article blasting the bad team that has lost its last seven games and is on pace to miss the playoffs for an NHL-record 11th time in a row during their continuing mission to badly go where no one has gone before, perhaps it’s time to have a little fun. There is always time later to further outline what new and exciting bad things are happening to the team that’s been bad since the last active NASA space shuttle Atlantis touched down for the final time on July 21, 2011.
For now, it’s time to rearrange the lines in order to shake things up because that’s typically what coaches do when their team gets into a stagnant state. The Sabres have gotten stellar goaltending from young Ukko-Pekka Luukkonen over the past three games as he’s amassed a .938 save percentage and a 1.98 GAA. The Sabres have also only scored three goals over those three games.
Ok, my lines:
Brett Murray - Tage Thompson - Kyle Okposo:
Simply put, I’m going for largeness here and this is the biggest, largest line that the Sabres could possibly assemble. Is this tongue-in-cheek? A little, but it sure would be fun to see what that enormous line would look like against some small players, or even regular players. They’re not playing for anything meaningful at this point so let’s see the big guys line. Plus, Tage Thompson has cooled off a little bit, so maybe a change would do him good.
Jeff Skinner-Dylan Cozens-Victor Olofsson:
Fans haven’t been super thrilled with Dylan Cozens’ linemates throughout the majority of the season. I like Vinnie Hinostroza more than most so that hasn’t been high on my “airing of grievances… list of priorities. While Cozens, Murray and Okposo looked okay against the Rangers on Saturday, Cozens didn’t manage any points and has laid a goose egg over his last four contests. This line would give the Sabres a chance to see three of the faster players on the team assembled on one line.
Rasmus Asplund - Mark Jankowski – Vinnie Hinostroza:
This line has a little bit of everything: some offense, some defense, some size, some speed. Granted, there’s not a lot of those things, but there is some of each and that’s what a modern third line should bring. Jankowski provides the defensive presence, Hinostroza brings a touch of offense and Asplund can do a bit of both.
Anders Bjork - Zemgus Girgensons – John Hayden:
Cody Eakin has turned back into an analytics pumpkin after being something like the belle of the ball early on the season. The Sabres don’t need to see him anymore. The Sabres could maybe salvage something from Bjork this year in order to perhaps acquire an asset for him at the trade deadline if they’re able to give him some ice time and get him some points. Girgensons at center is whatever. He’ll figure it out.
Rasmus Dahlin – Henri Jokiharju:
Dahlin played one of his finest games of the year on Saturday while paired with Jokiharju. Keep this going.
Robert Hagg – Colin Miller:
This is the closest approximation to a shutdown defensive pair that the Sabres can muster. It’s two seasoned vets. One plays offense and one plays defense. Go get it, old guys!
Jacob Bryson – Mark Pysyk:
Speedy guy and cagey vet. What’s not to like here?
Now it’s the random name generator’s chance to spit out some lines. This should be fun.
Brett Murray – Cody Eakin – Anders Bjork:
Ok, so this isn’t a terrific first line, but the random name generator spouted off a reasonable approximation of a 4th line. This line could exist in this universe. Does it really matter if Bjork is on his off wing? Maybe they should try it to get him going.
Zemgus Girgensons – John Hayden – Rasmus Asplund:
The random name generator is getting all the checking lines out of the way early. Again, this is totally reasonable! This line too is believable.
Vinnie Hinostroza – Jeff Skinner – Dylan Cozens:
The brave artificial intelligence has the cajones to try Jeff Skinner at center. This line is all gas and no brakes. We don’t need defense where we’re going. This line is a one-way ticket to Speedtown.
Tage Thompson – Kyle Okposo – Victor Olofsson:
Kyle Okposo leads the team in points, ergo he should be the first-line center. The bot’s logic is fool proof. I wonder if Kyle Okposo has ever played center. Perhaps he did as a 10-year-old. Nice job thinking outside the box, bot. Jankowski ended up as the scratch, which, again, makes some kind of sense.
Robert Hagg- Mark Pysyk:
This has probably already happened this year.
Henri Jokiharju – Will Butcher:
Moving Jokiharju off his strong side is a bold move. Perhaps it could be just the thing to get Butcher going this season.
Jacob Bryson – Rasmus Dahlin:
Oh, yes. Play this defensive pairing with the Hinostroza-Skinner-Cozens line for the Jeremy Clarkson-approved SPEEEEEEEED line. They’ll be flying around the ice at 100 miles-per-hour. So what if that speed is spent circling chaotically through the defensive zone. It’ll be fun.
Great work, bot.
Feel free to post your line combos in the comments.