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Boston Bruins Blogger •
Well hello, my fellow night owls on Hockeybuzz, perusing the interweb for the latest updates as it is officially July 1st here on the East Coast. Color me extremely confused at the moment. Rumor has it that Marian Hossa has been given permission to have preliminary discussions with two NHL teams: the Vancouver Canucks and the Boston Bruins.
You don't say! Well, according to Bruce Garrioch's latest post, that just might be the case.
Take a look:
Interesting. There was a lot of buzz around Boston about Hossa potentially coming to Boston LAST summer. Now suddenly on the eve of the free agent frenzy, the rumor has resurfaced. The B's would have needed to make a few trimmings to their roster last time around in order to fit Hossa in under the cap. So, given their current financial situation, I can only see it working out if the following happens....
1) Phil Kessel walks away, and the Bruins are compensated with draft picks when he signs an offer sheet.
2) Wave goodbye to some combination of Aaron Ward, Chuck Kobasew, Patrice Bergeron, Andrew Ference and Marco Sturm.
or, maybe, exclude #2 if.......
3) Hossa is SO intent on winning that he will spare the Bruins by signing for somewhere around $4 million dollars. A move that would undoubtedly really piss off the players association. Something tells me they'd frown on the news, knowing they'd be hearing comparisons to Hossa's contract by bidding GMs for years to come.
In the meantime.......
Peter Chiarelli declared during his conference call this afternoon that he possesses the funds to sign all of the team's RFAs prior to free agency beginning (Kessel, Hunwick, Bitz). But...the man says "Hey, you know what? Screw deadlines. I'll take care of business when I'm ready to!". Okay....he didn't quite say that, but you get my point. There is some master plan at work here, with PC deciding to roll the dice and see if any of the three (notably Kessel or Hunwick) receive an offer from another team. How this could all play out........
1) No one makes a peep and neither Kessel nor Hunwick are made offers.
2) An offer LOWER than expected is made, Chiarelli matches it, and saves himself a few bucks in the process. That sly SOB.
3) An offer HIGHER than expected is made, and Chiarelli is left with egg splattered all over his face, the yellow yoke dripping from his chic glasses, as Kessel and/or Hunwick parades out of town.
or maybe....
4) An offer HIGHER than expected is made...and Chiarelli devilishly laughs as he rids himself of the intolerable Phil Kessel, and receives oodles of draft picks back in return.
*Insert maniacal laughter here*
Again, who knows? Not I, the skeptical speculator. But what I do know is........
Buying out Peter Schaefer, right now, was about as productive as....well, Peter Schaefer's career in Boston. What a sham. The guy got buried in Providence in order to spare the salary cap, and ice the best team possible. Now with the team struggling to pinch every available penny in order to retain their young, talented RFAs, they tack on another $567,000 to the cap for the next two seasons just to rid themselves of Mr. Soul Patch? Really? Was this the right time for such a move?
Was Schaefer, who put in an honest effort in roughly 10 career games in Boston, that much of a cancer in the AHL locker room? I mean, I wouldn't doubt it. A few friends of mine who regularly attend games at the Dunkin Donuts Center noted that Schaefer literally looked like he couldn't care less while on the ice. How's that for an inspiration to the young up-and-comers on the team? Yikes! However, wouldn't it have been far more reasonable to just give Schaefer press-box duties down in Providence, or place him on the IR with a severe case of the lazies, as opposed to buying him out and kicking the limited cap space available in the family jewels?
*Shakes head*
And finally, as I wrap things up here, I just wanted to share my thoughts on one last rumor: Mike Komisarek to Boston. Here are ten things that I think are more likely to happen than Komisarek, the personal punching bag for Milan Lucic and aspiring optometrist for Matt Hunwick (he wasn't gouging Hunwick's eyes...he was examining them!), coming to Boston.......
1) Ray Bourque is going to come out of retirement, capture the O'Byrne trophy (formerly known as the Norris Trophy, but aptly renamed for the Canadiens' defenseman), lead the Bruins to a cup, and surpass Wayne Gretzky as the league's all time leading scorer.... by mid-season.
2) Rich Uncle Pennybags, the mascot for the game Monopoly, will step forward and buy the Phoenix Coyotes for the sum of two "get out of jail free" cards, one matured $20 bond, and the rights to Baltic Avenue and Reading Railroad.
3) Gary Bettman is finally going to step down as Commissioner, but under one condition: Chuck Woolery must be named as his replacement.
4) Dion Phaneuf will be traded to the Boston Bruins. But more importantly, his girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert will realize that hockey writers are just as appealing as hockey players. We'll celebrate this moment together in the penalty box while everyone's paying attention to his introductory press conference.
5) Dion Phaneuf will become the father of a child that resembles him in no way, shape or form, sometime around...oh let's say next April. The baby will exit the womb wearing a Thursday wrist band and black framed glasses.
6) Former NHL forward Mike Ricci will appear on the cover of GQ magazine.
7) I will genuinely laugh out loud at one of those Geico caveman commercials. Then I will go outside and beat a dead horse just to know what it feels like. We get it, a caveman could do it, you're upset....let's try a new approach already.
8) The Motion Picture Association will honor "The Blair Witch Project" as the greatest film of all time, just edging out "Slap Shot 2" by a handful of votes.
9) The U.S. government will determine that eliminating Twitter and Facebook are the best way to keep the population down. People will actually be forced to go outside, increasing their chances of contracting a deadly disease, getting hit by a bus or possibly realizing they have nothing left to live for and jumping off of a cliff (during which they will wish, while descending, they could tweet about such a moment).
10) Hell freezes over. Cause the list just has to end this way. Why? Don't ask why, I make the rules here.
Komisarek -----> Boston = FAIL
That's all I've got. So hurry up and get to bed, or Santa won't leave any free agents for you under the tree. But, if you feel like leaving a loving reply for me before you go, I'm sure he won't mind.
JC
Shameless Twitter Self-Promotion:
You don't say! Well, according to Bruce Garrioch's latest post, that just might be the case.
Take a look:
HEATLEY AND HOSSA
The deal is pending. Waiting for Dany Heatley's approval. If this dies, he might never get dealt. To Edmonton for Andrew Cogliano, Dustin Penner and Ladislav Smid. Needs Heatley's okay. Club has been waiting four hours.
As for Marian Hossa, the word is the Detroit winger can speak with the teams now _ including Boston and Vancouver.
Interesting. There was a lot of buzz around Boston about Hossa potentially coming to Boston LAST summer. Now suddenly on the eve of the free agent frenzy, the rumor has resurfaced. The B's would have needed to make a few trimmings to their roster last time around in order to fit Hossa in under the cap. So, given their current financial situation, I can only see it working out if the following happens....
1) Phil Kessel walks away, and the Bruins are compensated with draft picks when he signs an offer sheet.
2) Wave goodbye to some combination of Aaron Ward, Chuck Kobasew, Patrice Bergeron, Andrew Ference and Marco Sturm.
or, maybe, exclude #2 if.......
3) Hossa is SO intent on winning that he will spare the Bruins by signing for somewhere around $4 million dollars. A move that would undoubtedly really piss off the players association. Something tells me they'd frown on the news, knowing they'd be hearing comparisons to Hossa's contract by bidding GMs for years to come.
In the meantime.......
Peter Chiarelli declared during his conference call this afternoon that he possesses the funds to sign all of the team's RFAs prior to free agency beginning (Kessel, Hunwick, Bitz). But...the man says "Hey, you know what? Screw deadlines. I'll take care of business when I'm ready to!". Okay....he didn't quite say that, but you get my point. There is some master plan at work here, with PC deciding to roll the dice and see if any of the three (notably Kessel or Hunwick) receive an offer from another team. How this could all play out........
1) No one makes a peep and neither Kessel nor Hunwick are made offers.
2) An offer LOWER than expected is made, Chiarelli matches it, and saves himself a few bucks in the process. That sly SOB.
3) An offer HIGHER than expected is made, and Chiarelli is left with egg splattered all over his face, the yellow yoke dripping from his chic glasses, as Kessel and/or Hunwick parades out of town.
or maybe....
4) An offer HIGHER than expected is made...and Chiarelli devilishly laughs as he rids himself of the intolerable Phil Kessel, and receives oodles of draft picks back in return.
*Insert maniacal laughter here*
Again, who knows? Not I, the skeptical speculator. But what I do know is........
Buying out Peter Schaefer, right now, was about as productive as....well, Peter Schaefer's career in Boston. What a sham. The guy got buried in Providence in order to spare the salary cap, and ice the best team possible. Now with the team struggling to pinch every available penny in order to retain their young, talented RFAs, they tack on another $567,000 to the cap for the next two seasons just to rid themselves of Mr. Soul Patch? Really? Was this the right time for such a move?
Was Schaefer, who put in an honest effort in roughly 10 career games in Boston, that much of a cancer in the AHL locker room? I mean, I wouldn't doubt it. A few friends of mine who regularly attend games at the Dunkin Donuts Center noted that Schaefer literally looked like he couldn't care less while on the ice. How's that for an inspiration to the young up-and-comers on the team? Yikes! However, wouldn't it have been far more reasonable to just give Schaefer press-box duties down in Providence, or place him on the IR with a severe case of the lazies, as opposed to buying him out and kicking the limited cap space available in the family jewels?
*Shakes head*
And finally, as I wrap things up here, I just wanted to share my thoughts on one last rumor: Mike Komisarek to Boston. Here are ten things that I think are more likely to happen than Komisarek, the personal punching bag for Milan Lucic and aspiring optometrist for Matt Hunwick (he wasn't gouging Hunwick's eyes...he was examining them!), coming to Boston.......
1) Ray Bourque is going to come out of retirement, capture the O'Byrne trophy (formerly known as the Norris Trophy, but aptly renamed for the Canadiens' defenseman), lead the Bruins to a cup, and surpass Wayne Gretzky as the league's all time leading scorer.... by mid-season.
2) Rich Uncle Pennybags, the mascot for the game Monopoly, will step forward and buy the Phoenix Coyotes for the sum of two "get out of jail free" cards, one matured $20 bond, and the rights to Baltic Avenue and Reading Railroad.
3) Gary Bettman is finally going to step down as Commissioner, but under one condition: Chuck Woolery must be named as his replacement.
4) Dion Phaneuf will be traded to the Boston Bruins. But more importantly, his girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert will realize that hockey writers are just as appealing as hockey players. We'll celebrate this moment together in the penalty box while everyone's paying attention to his introductory press conference.
5) Dion Phaneuf will become the father of a child that resembles him in no way, shape or form, sometime around...oh let's say next April. The baby will exit the womb wearing a Thursday wrist band and black framed glasses.
6) Former NHL forward Mike Ricci will appear on the cover of GQ magazine.
7) I will genuinely laugh out loud at one of those Geico caveman commercials. Then I will go outside and beat a dead horse just to know what it feels like. We get it, a caveman could do it, you're upset....let's try a new approach already.
8) The Motion Picture Association will honor "The Blair Witch Project" as the greatest film of all time, just edging out "Slap Shot 2" by a handful of votes.
9) The U.S. government will determine that eliminating Twitter and Facebook are the best way to keep the population down. People will actually be forced to go outside, increasing their chances of contracting a deadly disease, getting hit by a bus or possibly realizing they have nothing left to live for and jumping off of a cliff (during which they will wish, while descending, they could tweet about such a moment).
10) Hell freezes over. Cause the list just has to end this way. Why? Don't ask why, I make the rules here.
Komisarek -----> Boston = FAIL
That's all I've got. So hurry up and get to bed, or Santa won't leave any free agents for you under the tree. But, if you feel like leaving a loving reply for me before you go, I'm sure he won't mind.
JC
Shameless Twitter Self-Promotion:
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