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Saying Goodbye to an Icon

June 20, 2012, 3:46 PM ET [22 Comments]
Travis Yost
Ottawa Senators Blogger • RSSArchiveCONTACT
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With so much cap room and an assortment of valuable prospects and draft picks, attention in Ottawa has shifted towards General Manager Bryan Murray in his quest to immediately improve the franchise in Y2 of the alleged three-year rebuild.

It's not the most glorious of situations for players like Filip Kuba, Matt Carkner, Zenon Konopka, et al. -- all of whom could be suiting up with another team by the end of the summer. It's another UFA exodus -- one that's ultimately signalling a changing of the guard in the nation's capital. Collectively, they're as good as gone, and few seem to really mind.

Still, that hasn't stopped local beat writers and bloggers for occasionally waxing poetic about the retention of Player X's services. The Ottawa Sun -- led by Bruce Garrioch and Don Brennan -- continue to argue in favor of bringing back the two tough guys in Carkner and Konopka. Others are still considering the return of Filip Kuba on a short-term deal, if only because even the league-average replacement may not be available when free agency opens up next year.

It's not just the city of Ottawa; rather, the nature of professional hockey. Look hard enough, and most of the time, you'll find someone, somewhere championing the cause of a player.

As with every rule, there's always an exception. And with respect to the above, that exception comes in the form of Ottawa Senators F Francis Lessard -- the single-worst hockey player I've ever seen play since the lockout was lifted, and probably longer.

Lessard's pending free agency sure came about quietly. How could I have missed it? Sure, Lessard toiled in the AHL all season long, but there hasn't been much of anything written about him in a solid month. Everyone's resigned to the fact that he's a sunk-cost by AHL standards, and few -- if any -- care.

That's not going to stop me from burning up a meaningless mid-summer day in the NHL off-season to write about an icon like Francis Lessard, though. The memories he's given us over the past two years will last a lifetime.

I mentioned above that Lessard's the single-worst hockey player I've ever seen since the 2004-2005 NHL Lockout, and I wasn't exaggerating in the slightest. Offensively, Lessard's entirely incapable of skating a single-shift without hitting the deck. Balance - zero. Speed - zero. Agility - zero. Awesomeness -- chart-topping.

There's no way to quantify how laughably bad his offensive skill set is, although I do believe some levels of calculus -- limit of f as x approaches negative infinity -- can turn that into a number for you. One goal in one-hundred fifteen games played at the NHL level, spanning five seasons with the Atlanta Thrashers and Ottawa Senators. His lone career goal(!) came against the Florida Panthers(shame on you, South Beach) in 2003-2004, turning his career 25% shot percentage against the Cats into a most legendary professional accomplishment.

Lessard would've probably been another run-in-the-mill AHL goon in Ottawa's system had it not been for last year's stinker of a season. The team was so bad -- and, compounding the issue, so injury-riddled -- it had no choice to turn to Francis Lessard. For twenty-four games. And no, he didn't disappoint.

Lessard added seventy-eight penalty minutes (an incredible feat at a 3:51 TOI/G), zero goals, zero assists, and one kill shot of Tom Pyatt(Montreal) to his 2010-2011 campaign. Knowing that his professional playing days were probably coming to a close, Lessard decided to go out with a bang. Whether or not he receives another contract, his playing days at the NHL level are probably over, meaning his greater than 3:1 PIM/GP ratio should hold up as one of the most impressive in the post-lockout era.

The highlight of all highlights for Lessard last year, though, was a scrap with Jay Rosehill -- sworn AHL enemy -- of the Toronto Maple Leafs. See, Lessard may have zero hockey talent, but the guy does have at least some desirable attributes. He's tough as absolute nails. Lessard's the kind of guy who could get an appendectomy and skate in a game the same night(almost certainly getting ejected in the process):



Lessard and Rosehill have been damaging one another's brain cells for years, and this fight probably eradicated what was left between the ears of these two brawlers.

Last summer, upon the arrival of puck-possession wizard Paul MacLean and an influx of young talent, Lessard was once again relegated to the AHL. He skated forty-three games with Kurt Kleinendorst's Binghamton Senators, scoring one goal, one assist, and racking up a hundred and thirty-eight PIMs. Vintage Franky Lessard.

That's not to say he didn't get his shots in when he could, though. Prior to his inevitable demotion, Francis Lessard nearly decapitated teammate Nikita Filatov in a calm scrimmage. Lessard decided that coming blindside on Filatov would be his last hurrah, much to the delight chagrin of Paul MacLean, Matt Carkner, and pretty much everyone else with a brain.

Said MacLean of the incident:

Asked if he’d sit Lessard down for a meeting to discuss the matter, MacLean said: “There’ll have to be another one.”


It's almost impossible to believe that Lessard was a third-round pick at one point, being selected well ahead of talents like Jason Chimera and Brian Campbell.

I'm not sure where Francis Lessard is going to end up next, but man, am I going to miss him.

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